Have u ever waken up one day realizing (I'M mature),of course NOT..in order to feel that way u must go through a lot ,being responsible ,being independent ,surviving a heart break or two, being comfortable with who you are and how u live….and much more….
What I'm afraid of is ,what if u have limited experience regarding almost everything, what if you are sheltered u can't even give fill the gas in your car b/c u might get it wrong(Hindi workers do the whole process u only sit In your car but it doesn't matter by papa still thinks I can't handle it), what if u freeze in public but when u gain your composure ,u sound very confident and easy to talk to, what if takes you a while to be at ease around other ppl,but once u finally do u can't ever stop talking…
What if almost every1 around u if obsessed with taking super extra care of themselves but u only sleep, eat and well. sleep some more, what if u stay up at night thinking of new creative ways to lie at your parents just do something soo damn simple like stay late with your friends,,,
And the biggest IF, what if u r a hopeless case, too afraid to take risks ,2 lazy to change your life, does that mean you can never be mature even if you r 30,when I reached 21 ,I felt absolutely nothing, it didn't change how I feel about myself ,I'm not satisfied with how my life is, I have so much I want to change I don't even know where to begin, today I asked my friend ,don't u feel different ,don't u feel older, more mature.. Anything!!!!! , and she just laughed and said .no I like being a kid….and that just hit me. I've been told more than once that I complicate things and no one but(A)took the time to know that I'm a bit complex b/c my life was complicated, soo I can't just wake up and be all cheery and smiley and TAKE IT EASY as some ppl might say, I don't even know where I'm going with this this, college was a huge turning point in my life, I truly hope that entering the work field will shape my character and make me the best I can be or I'm I A HOPELESS DREAMER??.
4 comments:
IMAN, maturity and experience are overrated. They are inevitable as you become older and interact with the world, and you already sound like you're there. There is this pressure to be older and we spend most of our lives as grown-ups but where is the fun in that?
I think you expect to be hit by the change in your age each year, however, most often, nothing would have changed in your mindset from when you were 12-15 years old. That's how I felt the last 10 years, always thinking "Shoulsn't I be feeling different, or at least doing different things or thinking in different ways now that I'm 23, 25, 27?" And the answer is always yes, but the experience is a big NO.
I think the trick is to try and experience things you wouldn't usually. A variety of different, but enriching, experiences is what's most likely to make you feel mature, that or smooching siblings. LoL.
aya..thanx girll,,i agree with u ,there is no fun in that keleesh....
firefly: you are absolutely right, and that is exactly what I'm trying to do these days, going places I wouldn't normally go, trying to add new experiences in my life, ect.
Its not like you will cross a boundary called maturity in one day but it comes with time...When you are a kid, you are content with killing insects, you become rebellious or big mouhed in teenage years e.t.c There is a lot of stuff that i did five years ago that i cant do today, the reason being am more mature today!
Post a Comment